Dream Theater - The Astonishing (2016)^{Release ID: 1311}

It pains me to do this. I’ve been a Dream Theater fan since 2003, when they very quickly became one of my all-time favourite bands, a position they still hold to this day (well, top three, anyway!). Their career is literally one masterpiece after another. Until drummer Mike Portnoy left the band, that is. The first album without him, 2010’s ‘A Dramatic Turn of Events’ is still an incredible release, but 2013’s self-titled ‘Dream Theater’ started to see a decline in quality, and that then brings us to this, 2016’s two-disc concept album nerd convention, ‘The Astonishing’.

It’s naff.

I mean, I’ve tried and I’ve tried, but it just feels like the band is well and truly on autopilot at this point. There is nothing overly memorable about this album, just a couple of tracks here and there. But at a combined duration of over two hours, ‘The Astonishing’ is such a drudgery to listen to in one sitting, especially for such bare rewards. Of course, the musical performances are exceptional, as you’d expect, but the rest, kind of sucks. The lyrics are naff, the songs are mostly naff, and the story is naff, though to be honest, I zone out so often that I don’t really pay much attention to it anyway.

If I had to pick out any highlights, I’d say ‘The Gift of Music’, ‘A Life Left Behind’ and ‘Our New World’ are all okay. Not brilliant, but not terrible either. If they could have condensed this album onto one disc, it MIGHT have been listenable, but as it is, an enjoyable 14 minutes out of 130 just isn’t worth the effort.

As I’m getting older (at the time of writing this, I’m 39 years old!), I find myself having less and less patience for albums that don’t grow on me quickly enough. And considering how long this slog of a record is, I think it’s time to pass on this one.