S.O.D. - Speak English or Die (1985)^{Release ID: 3038}

Stormtroopers of Death (S.O.D... duh!), is a crossover thrash side project of Anthrax members Scott Ian and Charlie Benante, along with Nuclear Assault’s Dan Lilker (formerly of Anthrax himself) and Billy Milano of the band M.O.D. Their debut album, ‘Speak English or Die’ was released in 1985, and is mostly a metal album with a punk mentality, with plenty of short, minute-long songs featuring satirical, aggressive, and downright offensive lyrics.

The problem for me is that it’s not 1985 anymore, and most of the satire, irony and downright offensive material goes straight over my desensitized head. The music is fast and heavy, and when the band do play for more than 30 seconds, there are a couple of decent headbangers here. But for the most part, these are all comical tracks, recorded by a bunch of friends who had some leftover studio time to kill. Oddly, this would go on to be a hugely influential album. Wish I could get that lucky.

Ultimately, this just isn’t my cup of tea, and the only reason it’s in my collection is because I’m a huge Anthrax fan. For what it’s worth, the songs ‘March of the S.O.D.’, ‘Sargent ‘D’ and the S.O.D.’ and ‘Milk’ are alright, and I’ve always found ‘What’s That Noise’ a pretty laughable track, but otherwise this is mostly immature and juvenile, and that’s probably exactly how the S.O.D. intended it to be.

‘Speak English or Die’ is not an album to be taken seriously, and whilst I’ve never been under the illusion that it was anything else, it’s just not something I’m into.

S.O.D. or Stormtroopers of Death were a four-piece crossover band consisting of Anthrax's Scott Ian, Dan Lilker and Charlie Benante with Billy Milano of hardcore band The Psychos (and later M.O.D.) on vocals, formed as an outlet for the Anthrax guys' love of hardcore punk. I've always been partial to a bit of hardcore myself, Bad Brains, Sick of It All, Minor Threat and early Suicidal Tendencies have all released some of my favourite records and at the time I was well into Speak English or Die. But... that was a long time ago.
The album actually starts off pretty well kicking off with the instro March of the S.O.D. leading into Sargent "D" & the S.O.D. sounding a lot like hyper-charged tracks from Among the Living with punky vocals. In fact the album isn't all that bad until we get to Anti-Procrastination Song then things go downhill fast, it's six seconds presumably lampooning Napalm Death's You Suffer and from then on the juvenile humour takes over and things get tedious. What's that Noise? has, like a noise in it that's really annoying... geddit? Premenstrual Princess, Pussy Whipped and the oh so hilarious Ballad of Jimi Hendrix are cringeworthy. By the time you add in the pointless Hey Gordy! and Diamonds and Rust (Extended Version) your intelligence has probably been insulted enough for one record.